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scottgalvini did an open mic on january 22nd at the first place I ever got on stage. it went okay. i hadn't performed for a year and a half and had not performed regularly since 2022. i was hoping to feel reinvigorated and jump right back into where i left off. instead, i remembered why i hate sitting through comedy shows these days. i was also reminded that performing doesn't do it for me anymore. the rush of performing doesn't hit like it used to. i think one of the biggest factors is that i don't drink anymore. upon reflection of the last 15 years, it seems i enjoyed an excuse to get drunk. i've only drank a handful of times since 2022. it doesn't hit like it used to either. the few times i've decided to "give it a try" just ended with me having a headache or going to bed early. i'm happy that i don't drink anymore. i hated the drunk version of myself. i ruined a lot by drinking, made a lot of shitty choices. i've driven a lot of good people out of my life because of not getting on medicine sooner. i'm at a point where i have an opportunity to "start over" so to speak and as much as i try to fit comedy in there it doesn't seem to have a place anymore.
i don't know who i am without comedy. i gave too much of myself to it when i should have worried about stability and things in my personal life. i put it before everything and until i ended up homeless it was the biggest priority in my life. i left my last job because i thought i wanted to put comedy first and it turned out to be a massive mistake.
when quitting a gas station is one of the bigger mistakes made in one's life it comes time to really prioritize things. i've not taken my work history serious for so long that my resume is complete trash. i still live with regret over quitting a job that was perfect for me. i've gotten nowhere with the applications i've put in.
my prostate still hurts daily. i have to piss constantly. it's severely affected my day to day life. i gained back the weight i lost. i am in pain for days following exercise. it has taken a toll on me mentally but i'm now to the point where i accept it and have learned to deal with it.
i am happy that i did the open mic. it was nice to see some people i hadn't seen for over a year. as far as my performance, i was happy with it. it wasn't good but it was nowhere near as bad as i was expecting. my timing was way off but i remembered my material. i tossed around the idea of going back in february but didn't end up going. i may go back in march. some days i feel determined to make it work. other days (like today) i feel like it's best to leave it all in the past.
i'm not homeless, i'm not hungry, i'm doing better mentally than i have in years. maybe ever. as much as there are things i'd like to change, i've learned not to dwell on them to the point of self sabotage or giving up entirely. i am grateful and i look forward to the future.
i don't know who i am without comedy. i gave too much of myself to it when i should have worried about stability and things in my personal life. i put it before everything and until i ended up homeless it was the biggest priority in my life. i left my last job because i thought i wanted to put comedy first and it turned out to be a massive mistake.
when quitting a gas station is one of the bigger mistakes made in one's life it comes time to really prioritize things. i've not taken my work history serious for so long that my resume is complete trash. i still live with regret over quitting a job that was perfect for me. i've gotten nowhere with the applications i've put in.
my prostate still hurts daily. i have to piss constantly. it's severely affected my day to day life. i gained back the weight i lost. i am in pain for days following exercise. it has taken a toll on me mentally but i'm now to the point where i accept it and have learned to deal with it.
i am happy that i did the open mic. it was nice to see some people i hadn't seen for over a year. as far as my performance, i was happy with it. it wasn't good but it was nowhere near as bad as i was expecting. my timing was way off but i remembered my material. i tossed around the idea of going back in february but didn't end up going. i may go back in march. some days i feel determined to make it work. other days (like today) i feel like it's best to leave it all in the past.
i'm not homeless, i'm not hungry, i'm doing better mentally than i have in years. maybe ever. as much as there are things i'd like to change, i've learned not to dwell on them to the point of self sabotage or giving up entirely. i am grateful and i look forward to the future.
